


konoha crush

by ekubo



Category: Naruto
Genre: BAMF Umino Iruka, M/M, Slow Burn, Unrequited Crush, angst because i like getting hurt, except it's not really unrequited, it's cute though, kakashi blushes a lot, kakashi is super obvious, like BAD flirting, there's lots of flirting, they get trapped in a closet at one point, y'all KNOW it's gonna end happy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-02-15
Updated: 2019-02-21
Packaged: 2019-10-29 07:13:04
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,786
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17803442
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ekubo/pseuds/ekubo
Summary: in which the famous copy-nin blushes. a LOT.(ps this is on hiatus until further notice sorry :( )





	1. the one with the introductions

**Author's Note:**

> this idea came to me in a sequence of vivid daydreams while under the wonderful influence of piña colada-flavored weed and the sweetest moscato i've ever drank

Kakashi sighed. 

The mission room conveniently chose only time Kakashi had free to be swamped with jonin and chunin that just returned to the village. It was noisy with rambunctious shinobi still high on adrenaline and overlapping chatter. His eye flicked around the room lazily before circling back to the place he left off in _Icha Icha_. 

Someone behind him tapped his shoulder lightly. “Uh, would you mind moving up?”

Kakashi glanced up from his book and saw the line had moved a few feet in front of him. Without bothering to face whoever was behind him or offer an apology, he slammed _Icha Icha_ shut and slunk forward. He could feel the jonin behind him flinch and he fought the smirk on his lips. 

As he neared the front of the line, Kakashi realized there was an unfamiliar face among the chunin handing out scrolls. He wracked his brain to try and place a name to the newcomer but came up short; he wouldn't have forgotten _that_ face, not in a million years. 

The man looked a few years younger than Kakashi but the ease at which he lectured jonin about their inadequate reports made it seem like he’d been doing this forever. The silver-haired shinobi cocked his head to the side slightly and examined the man. His skin was tanned and smooth; the only flaw Kakashi could find was the large scar bisecting his face across his nose. He hesitated to consider it a flaw when he saw the way it scrunched up in displeasure with the rest of his nose at the scroll he held in his hand. His dark brown hair was pulled back into a high ponytail and his leaf hitai-ate was secure around his forehead. The man’s jaw clenched and Kakashi admired the strong curve of his face; his eye drifted down to the chunin’s wide mouth and he decided that this particular shinobi was the most handsome man he’d ever laid eyes on. 

Kakashi bit back a smile when the chunin slammed the scroll onto the table with enough force to make the ninja in front of him take a tiny step back. 

“How many missions have you been on, jonin-san?” the man asked calmly. He looked at the jonin before him sweetly, brown eyes wide and expectant. His lips were tilted upwards at the corners in a seemingly friendly manner but his tone suggested the poor nin was in for the lecture of a lifetime. 

“I don’t see how that’s relevant-“ he started, only to be cut off by the chunin with a quirk of his eyebrow. 

“9 S-rank, 23 A-rank, 31 B-rank, 56 C-rank, and 62 D-rank. Does that sound correct?”

The jonin’s shoulders tensed. “Yes.”

“Humor me, jonin-san,” the man continued. “Around what percentage of those missions did you write a report?”

The jonin thought for a second before answering, “Probably 85 to 90 percent of them. Why are we talking about how many missions I’ve been on?”

The chunin hummed and leaned back in his chair, bringing a hand up to stroke his jaw thoughtfully. “Now that’s what, about 181 missions? And let's say you filled out mission reports for 90 percent of them. That would be about 160 missions, would it not?” The jonin nodded. “Tell me, since you seem to be familiar with the way things work. Why can’t you fill out a mission report for a barely-D-ranked mission to escort a cabbage farmer to the border of Fire Country correctly?”

Snickers and poorly-concealed laughs erupted from the leaf nin within proximity of the interaction. Kakashi couldn’t stop his grin as he imagined the jonin looking flustered from the chunin behind the desk. 

“I-I,” the jonin stammered. The handsome chunin tossed the scroll to the embarrassed nin noncommittally. 

“Do it again and don’t come back until it’s done,” he replied off-handedly, his tone light as his eyes narrowed dangerously. “Next!”

The next shinobi in line practically shook with fear as he handed his scroll to the calm-looking chunin. His eyes skimmed across the page before he shut it with a beaming smile that made Kakashi’s heart skip a beat. 

_Oh_. 

“Now this,” the chunin started, “is a proper mission report. Thank you for not completely wasting my time, shinobi-san.” Kakashi could see the visible breath the jonin let out from two people away. The chunin handed the jonin his payment and motioned for the next scroll. A shinobi Kakashi recognized as Shiranui Genma strolled forward and handed the chunin his scroll before placing his hands on the table and leaning forward flirtatiously. 

“Haven’t seen you here before,” the senbon-wielding jonin drawled, his fingers smoothing over the table absentmindedly. From the way he had his hip cocked and was twirling his senbon in his mouth suggested that he too was interested in the new chunin manning the mission desk. Kakashi’s body suddenly filled with heat and he almost gaped at the primal urge he had to throw Genma out the window and let his ninken have their merry way with him. He sucked in a quick breath and focused on the reaction of the scarred man.

“Well, Shiranui-san, had you filed this report a week ago when it was due, we could have met sooner,” he said sweetly as he rolled the scroll back up before handing Genma a pouch with his earnings. “Are all jonin so lazy?”

Kakashi covered his shriek of laughter with a cough and found himself grinning behind his mask again. He noticed Genma tense, his previously flirty demeanor gone and replaced with what Kakashi could only imagine was shame. He took the pouch from the smug chunin and flickered away without a word.

The silver-haired jonin looked back at the chunin, who was occupied with writing a note on a scroll. Kakashi suddenly was aware that there was only one person between him and the handsome shinobi behind the desk. Sensing he was being watched, the chunin glanced up and sparkling brown eyes met with the dark gray of the jonin’s eye; Kakashi flushed under his mask and the chunin smirked before continuing his writing.

After a moment, he raised his hand and flicked his wrist, gesturing for the next shinobi in line to come forward. Kakashi couldn’t hear anything except the pounding heart in his ears. He was mortified that he had been caught staring at the chunin but didn’t understand why his heart sped up when the brown-haired man smirked coyly at him. His heart leapt to his throat as he watched the jonin at the desk walk away and he realized it was his turn next. 

“Are you gonna stand there all night, Hatake-san?”

Kakashi refused to shiver at hearing his name come from that pretty mouth. He took a step forward and feigned a bored expression, hoping his mask covered the flaming blush on his cheeks. “Maa, sometimes you just get lost on the path of life, eh…?” He paused and widened his eye slightly, waiting for the man to introduce himself. Kakashi almost got distracted by the man’s dark lashes fluttering as his eyes arched with his kind smile.

“Iruka. Umino Iruka.”

Iruka. “Well, _Iruka_ , have you been on mission desk duty long? I don’t think I’ve had the pleasure of making your acquaintance,” Kakashi replied while shifting his weight to his right leg and rolling his shoulders back slightly.

The corner of Iruka’s lips tilted up into a lopsided grin that made the poor jonin’s heart stutter and almost beat out of his chest. “Maybe if you came in to get a mission instead of lounging around all day reading smut you could have ‘made my acquaintance’ at a time when I wasn’t swamped with work you jonin put off until the last possible second.”

Kakashi was sure his face was on fire. “Maa, if you really knew me you’d know I’m only lazy on purpose.”

“Oh, so you willingly neglect your duty as an elite shinobi of Konohagakure?” Iruka hummed thoughtfully. “Interesting,” he added, his eyes glinting with so much mischief that Kakashi’s stomach fluttered. “Perhaps it’s time you changed your ways.”

Kakashi leaned down to try and intimidate the chunin, but he knew it was in vain. Stopping a few inches from Iruka’s face, Kakashi maintained eye contact; the chunin stared up at him defiantly, challenging him. “And what do you suggest, _Umino-san_?”

Iruka leaned in so close Kakashi could feel warm breath on his mask and he fought the urge to swallow the lump in his throat. “Ah, I know just the thing,” he breathed. Kakashi’s heart was doing backflips in his chest and the strange feeling in his stomach could only be described as butterflies. He felt his pulse in his ears and hoped the hitch in his breath wasn’t obvious.

“Hm?” Kakashi murmured. He watched the chunin with a half-lidded gaze and thumping heart.

Iruka sighed and Kakashi tried not to focus on how much he wanted to see if Iruka tasted as minty as he smelled. The spell broke when Iruka slammed a scroll to Kakashi’s chest; the sudden action almost made Kakashi jump but he was a jonin, dammit, so he quickly snatched the new mission from the beaming chunin.

“Turn in your mission report on time and then maybe you can _make my acquaintance better_.”

Kakashi heard a quiet chuckle from a few feet away, the culprit a chunin he recognized as Kamizuki Izumo, and tried not to blush. _Again_. He was suddenly hyper-aware of every pair of eyes on him and he fought to maintain his casual and lazy slouch. He tucked the scroll into a pouch on his flak vest and shoved his hands into his pockets before regarding the handsome brunette before him with a sweet arch-eyed smile. Iruka’s lips twitched in amusement.

“It’s a date,” Kakashi said smoothly. He didn’t miss the slight pink blush dusting the chunin’s cheeks before he disappeared into a swirling cloud of dust and leaves.


	2. the one with the tingles

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> in which kakashi is swept off his feet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay so i finally realized where i want to take this story and it's going to be longer than i originally planned! i have over 6k words written now and i still have 5 chapters after this one in mind :-) so the chapters will be a bit shorter (probably about 2k words or so each) but there will be more chapters than i first thought!! thanks to everyone who enjoyed the first chapter and i hope you like what i have planned :)

In hindsight, Kakashi had done things far more stupid and reckless.

He stumbled through the trees bordering Konoha and hardly noticed his injuries. Hardly. Chakra flowed through his body to dull the stabbing pains and while it was spotty and completely dangerous considering just how low on chakra he was, it worked. He could see the familiar wall surrounding his home and smiled in victory, speeding up as much as he could in his condition. The jonin knew the telltale signs of chakra depletion far too well and he tried to focus on getting into the village without collapsing into a heap of blood and broken bones. His plan failed spectacularly when he misjudged the distance between him and the next branch and tumbled to the ground hard and fast. He didn’t have the energy to react properly and instead braced himself for what was going to be a crushing fall.

A hard body caught him suddenly and gently despite how fast he was hurdling to the ground. Kakashi flinched violently before hissing in pain, the dull ache in his ribs intensifying to a blazing inferno that made him dizzy. His vision blurred and he realized that whoever caught him was leading him into the village; he turned his head to look at his savior and forced himself to look for the leaf hitai-ate on the man’s forehead before he lost consciousness.

He came to when they suddenly stopped and Kakashi’s body was set on a bench. Though Kakashi was barely coherent, he instantly smelled disinfectant and heard medi-nin rushing toward him. His body must have tensed because he felt a gentle hand on his arm smoothing over the fabric of his bicep. He had forgotten about the man who carried him there and seeked him out among the many voices he heard talking over one another down the hall, coming ever-closer.

“I’m here, Kakashi-san,” a familiar voice said. Kakashi’s heart almost stopped as he tried desperately to catch a glimpse of the man. Iruka. “You’re safe. I’ve got you.”

Kakashi’s vision returned enough for him to see the scarred chunin crouching on the ground before him. The man was just as distractingly handsome as Kakashi remembered and for a second he thought he might die of asphyxiation; Iruka looked at him with a small, reassuring smile and had one hand on his right bicep with the other on his left shoulder, holding him in a sitting position. Kakashi’s legs were being pressed together by Iruka’s thighs and his skin was alight with pins and needles. He never wished to die more than the moment he felt his face heat up in an embarrassed blush and Iruka’s smile widened as he no doubt saw the pink on the jonin’s cheeks. He had a few pieces of hair that escaped his ponytail falling into his face and his breathing was quick from carrying the jonin across the village at top speed. Kakashi’s heart felt like it was going to leap out of his chest and he decided to blame it on his body trying to pump enough blood to compensate for the large amount already lost by his impressive array of near-fatal injuries.

He barely had the chance to breathe out a response before he felt himself slipping into darkness.

 

Kakashi spent the next two weeks in the hospital. Tenzou came by on his third day of imprisonment to yell at him about being so reckless before punching his shoulder softly and mumbling something about how he was glad Kakashi was luckier than he was an idiot.

Other than Sarutobi Asuma and Maito Gai, he didn’t have many other visitors during the week. He normally wouldn’t mind but he couldn’t stop his heart from clenching in a particularly annoying fashion when he thought about Iruka. _Why hadn’t he come to visit Kakashi?_

With little else to do besides grumble about how bored he was to the nurses, Kakashi’s thoughts often drifted to the handsome brown-eyed shinobi. He wondered where he could be in the village and what he was doing. He wondered if Iruka thought of Kakashi.

The jonin sighed and tried to concentrate on _Icha Icha_ , but it was in vain. He would read a few words and his thoughts would drift to the chunin. He almost laughed out loud when he realized Iruka quite literally swept him off his feet and saved him. He knew that Tenzou would never let him live it down when he was fully recovered and Kakashi found he didn’t mind. The jonin would steal any opportunity he could to think of his handsome savior. He felt warmth spread across his body when natural light from outside peeked through the window but he knew it wasn’t from the sun. Kakashi sighed and shut his eye, feeling content for the first time in days.

“You seem pretty comfortable there, Hatake-san,” a familiar voice said in amusement. Kakashi’s eyes flew open and he sat up in his bed so quickly he saw black spots, whipping his head to face the newcomer. The chunin was at the door with his arms crossed, leaning his right side against the door frame lazily, a crooked smile playing on his lips. “If I didn’t know any better I would think you were enjoying yourself.”

Kakashi blanched and prayed to the gods— _any_ of them, _all_ of them—that he didn’t blush. The gods received his prayer and threw it back in his face while laughing and telling him to shove a kunai where the sun doesn’t shine. His body betrayed him and he felt heat crawling up his neck and into his cheeks before spreading to his ears. He wondered if he could sink into the floor and disappear forever. “Maa, you know how it goes,” he managed to choke out over the convulsing heart that seemed to be stuck in his throat. “Once you get a taste of laziness it’s hard to do much else.”

Iruka chuckled and pushed himself off the door frame, sauntering into the room with a grace Kakashi could only hope he could someday possess in front of the chunin. Iruka grabbed a wooden chair Tenzou left behind from beside the bed and swung it around; he slung his right leg over the seat so he was straddling the back of the chair and rested his forearms on the top of the arch before fixing his gaze on Kakashi.

“How are you feeling?”

Kakashi tried not to squirm under the chunin’s stare. “I’m recovering slowly but surely. I was reckless,” he said with a breathy laugh. Iruka smiled at him and Kakashi’s heart thumped painfully in his aching chest.

“Yeah you were,” he teased. “I’ve done some dumb shit but not that dumb.”

Kakashi laughed freely that time. His eye flicked over to the chunin and he almost shivered with delight when he saw Iruka also laughing, his head thrown back and eyes squinted shut with glee. After a few seconds, the chunin settled down and threw Kakashi a lopsided smile. The jonin was never more thankful for the absence of a heart monitor because he could feel his pulse quickening any time he looked at the handsome man. 

They exchanged small talk for a few minutes before they lapsed into a comfortable silence, the only sounds coming from the courtyard outside the window. Kakashi sneakily stole glances at Iruka out of the corner of his eye as the chunin watched outside the window with a ghost of a smile on his lips. He hummed and turned to face Kakashi again, rising from his seat. He placed the chair in its original spot by the wall and stood beside the hospital bed. His hand reached out and Kakashi’s breath caught in his throat as the chunin grabbed his shoulder and squeezed it gently, his thumb rubbing tiny circles into the jonin’s pale skin. “I’m really glad you’re okay, Hatake-san,” he said quietly with that heart-stopping crooked grin. Kakashi smiled and his eye curved up. His skin tingled where Iruka’s fingers grasped him and he hoped the younger man couldn’t feel his pulse through his warming skin.

“Thank you for visiting me, Umino-san. Your company is far more enjoyable than those sadistic nurses,” Kakashi grumbled playfully, trying not to focus on how Iruka’s thumb was still rubbing soothing circles into his shoulder absentmindedly. Iruka chuckled again, low and throaty, and tightened his grip on the jonin before releasing his shoulder; Kakashi tried not to pout at the absence of the handsome man’s touch.

“It’s my pleasure. Maybe next time we meet it will be in a more casual setting,” he said coyly, his smirk teasing. Kakashi felt a shiver run down his spine and almost didn’t notice the familiar blush rising to his face. His eye widened slightly and his mouth suddenly felt drier than the vast deserts of Sunagakure. To his horror, he all but squeaked in response. He felt that the gods owed him for earlier and wished to have his existence erased so he would never have to feel that embarrassed ever again—they laughed in his face a second time. Iruka’s grin looked like it was about to split his face in half and just when Kakashi thought his heart couldn’t take anymore, the chunin winked at him before opening the window and leaping out without a word.

The rest of Kakashi’s time at the hospital went by slowly and the jonin slowly lost his mind. After being caught trying to sneak out more than three times, Sarutobi Hiruzen himself visited and scolded Kakashi in a manner similar to Tenzou. So the silver-haired shinobi spent his last days in captivity wandering around the hospital and lazing in the windowsill of his room reading _Icha Icha_.

The day of his release, Kakashi found out, was a Friday. He thrilled at the idea of spending his weekend getting back to training before the new week started and he could barely contain his excited buzz. After being fussed over by chakra specialists and medi-nin for the better part of a day, they declared he should be released before the end of the day. Later, the nurses did a quick check of him to make sure there was no residual damage to his internal organs or chakra network before sending him on his way with a collective sigh of relief.

Kakashi could barely contain himself as he was allowed to run free for the first time in weeks. The sun hung low in the sky and illuminated the busy village with a hazy orange glow. He leapt across the rooftops, his steps light and fast, and traveled across the village hastily. He paused when he got to Hokage Tower and contemplated giving the Sandaime his mission report. His stomach growled almost angrily and the jonin decided the old man could wait; he was the one that ordered Kakashi to stay in the hospital for two weeks to recover, so he could wait a few more hours and allow Kakashi time to eat and shower. He turned and crouched, ready to continue on his way home before a familiar ponytail caught his eye. 

Iruka walked in the street with a tokubetsu jonin Kakashi recognized as Mitarashi Anko. He’d never worked with her personally, but her reputation of being a highly skilled kunoichi preceded her; Kakashi knew that she trained under the legendary sannin Orochimaru and guessed that she was just as powerful as he heard. They strolled casually and Kakashi could hear their laughter before they reached the front of the building. His blood ran cold when Anko threw an arm around the chunin and pulled him in for a quick kiss before she slapped his ass and flickered away with a cheeky grin. With a soft smile, Iruka rolled his eyes and continued on his way down the crowded road. 

Kakashi’s chest ached as he watched Iruka’s ponytail get smaller and smaller before disappearing completely. He stayed frozen in his perch on Hokage Tower long after the sun’s rays stopped warming his skin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if any of you want to keep up with updates or anything i’ll post about them on my twitter! :)) my @ is ilyiruka


	3. the one with the tension

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> in which things start to heat up. a _tiny_ bit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter is a bit longer than the first two and like the title says, get ready for some TENSION :-) hope you all enjoy!!

As summer neared, the heat of Konoha became almost unbearable. When on leave in the village, shinobi preferred to keep cool indoors and spend their time laying around and grumbling about the heat. Much to the Hokage’s chagrin, most of them preferred to lounge in light yukatas or less, deciding that keeping cool and comfortable trumped their readiness for potential battle. Should any rival village see Konoha’s elite ninja draped half-naked in windows and on the ground moaning about something as trivial as a heat wave, no one would take the village seriously ever again. 

Kakashi often took his time in the summer to busy himself with missions for the ANBU Black Ops. Contrary to the actions of his fellow shinobi, Kakashi grew restless in the summer months and chose to allow himself an outlet with which he could release any and all aggression and frustration. 

He sat crouching in a tree, hardly breathing behind his masks. He’d been waiting for his target for more than two hours and the dull burn of his legs reminded him that he should move around. He sighed slightly and started to rise from his position until a flash of movement caught his eye. 

Inside the apartment, his target moved confidently, familiar and comfortable in his surroundings. He had a scroll in his hand and he moved to sit on the couch perpendicular to the window Kakashi could see through. He unrolled the scroll on the wide table in front of the couch and sat with his body hunched over with his elbows on his knees, examining whatever was written inside. He read for a few minutes before reaching up and rubbing the scar on his nose.

Kakashi’s breath caught in his throat and his heart stuttered in its beats. It had been almost two months since he last saw Iruka and he cursed himself for not being able to get over whatever he was feeling. The jonin wanted nothing more than to see the scarred chunin face-to-face, but he couldn’t bring himself to approach him after his release from the hospital. So, like a coward, he busied himself with ANBU missions straight from the Sandaime so he wouldn’t have to face the man that never failed to make his face flush with warmth.

He remained deathly still, his heart pounding out of his chest, as the chunin rose from his seat and walked to the door leading to the small balcony. Iruka slid the door open and stepped outside, breathing in deep and exhaling with a quiet sigh. He moved forward to rest his arms on the railing, looking down into the dark street below them. Kakashi was sure if he tried to breathe now, he would choke, but also knew that if he continued to not breathe, he would pass out. He sucked in a silent and quick breath through his nose, his lungs heaving in his chest, desperate for that much-needed oxygen. He almost fell out of his post when Iruka’s gaze was suddenly on his hidden form in the shadows of the branches.

Kakashi knew there was no way Iruka could actually see him. Years of serving in covert units in ANBU proved his ability to remain hidden from sight for almost infinite stretches of time. He was confident in his ability to become one with the shadows; he _was_ confident, at least, until he felt the curious stare of the chunin on the shadows in the jonin’s vicinity. Kakashi’s skin prickled with panic and he fought the urge to flee; instead, he watched Iruka with his heartbeat echoing in his ears. 

Slowly and deliberately, he stood and confirmed his presence to the younger man on the balcony. The chunin watched him thoughtfully but didn’t look away; his eyes narrowed slightly, challenging the man hidden in the tree to make a move. Kakashi stared back with his arms loose around his sides, his fists clenched so hard he thought his fingerless gloves might tear from the strain. A gentle breeze swept between them, cool air brushing against Kakashi’s bare shoulders; the stark contrast to his blazing skin sharpened his senses but clouded his judgment and he moved without a single thought.

Kakashi appeared behind the chunin suddenly, his brain fuzzy and heart slamming painfully in his chest. Iruka didn’t flinch and only glanced over his shoulder at the masked man with a dangerous glint in his eye that almost made Kakashi shiver. The silver-haired shinobi fought to control his breathing as the chunin turned to face him, leaning his back on the railing casually and cocking his chin up slightly to look at him.

“Is there anything I can help you with, ANBU-san?” Iruka said with a low voice, settling his elbows on the railing behind him. Kakashi swallowed the lump in his throat and stepped closer, reaching around the chunin and grasping the warm metal rail to give his shaking hands something to hold onto. He didn’t look away from Iruka as he moved even closer, his porcelain mask now mere inches from the chunin’s face. They maintained eye contact and Kakashi realized a second too late he had both eyes open. There was no way Iruka didn’t know it was him.

But the chunin held his stare and didn’t move away. Kakashi was enamored, completely and utterly consumed by Iruka, and the rest of the world ceased to exist. He tried not to groan when he caught a whiff of Iruka’s mint shampoo. Kakashi’s eyes fluttered shut and he allowed himself to move close enough that he could feel the heat of Iruka’s strong body but not too close as to feel the press of their skin and clothes together. His lips parted beneath his mask and he had no idea what he was going to say, but he knew he had to say _something_ , _anything_ so he could be with Iruka for a few moments longer.

Just as he found his voice, the tattoo on his left shoulder burned with searing intensity and Kakashi hissed in annoyance. His eyes snapped open and met Iruka’s with desperation, silently conveying what he wanted to say but didn’t have the courage to voice. Iruka’s eyebrows scrunched together slightly and his mouth opened slightly before he closed it and clenched his jaw. He finally looked away from Kakashi as the jonin stepped back with a frown hidden by his masks, performing hand seals to flicker to Hokage Tower.

Kakashi materialized on one knee in front of the Sandaime, Sarutobi Hiruzen, and stared at the ground in confusion as he felt the lingering touch of fingertips on his arm.

 

Kakashi was going crazy. 

For days, all he could think about was the fleeting feeling of Iruka’s fingers on his skin. He laid awake four nights later, haunted by awful thoughts of _what if_. 

_What if he’d stayed? What if he hadn’t been summoned? What if he lost control and did what he desperately wanted to do?_

__

__

_What if he’d kissed Iruka?_

Deciding to give up on sleep, he pulled his standard-issue blacks and flak vest on hastily before securing his weapons pouch to the belt of his pants. He wrapped bandages around his thigh and calves before slipping on his sandals and hopping out of his window. 

The air was warm and the trees swayed gently with the cool breeze. The moon hung high in the sky and the village slept peacefully as Kakashi leaped from rooftop to rooftop silently. His mind raced as he traveled to the training grounds. He settled on the third training ground, wanting to take his frustration out on the wooden posts stationed there, and didn’t hesitate to attack when his feet touched the ground.

He had no idea how long he was there, shouting curses, throwing punches and kicks, abusing the battered training posts, abusing his body to release his pent up feelings. He’d long since abandoned his vest and stood a few feet from the middle post when he paused, his chest heaving and beads of sweat rolling down his neck. His grip around the kunai in his hand tightened and he rolled his neck and shoulders to relieve the building pressure in his tensed muscles.

A twig in the forest behind him snapped and Kakashi sent the kunai flying without hesitation before dropping into a defensive stance, his hand reaching to pull another from his pouch. He heard it ricochet off another blade and he spun the kunai around his finger to readjust his grip. 

“We really should consider having a conversation like normal people,” Iruka said before stepping into the clearing, a tiny smirk on his face and kunai hanging in his hand loosely. Kakashi dropped his arm and straightened. 

“Sorry,” Kakashi said, his voice hoarse. He wasn’t entirely sure if his rapid heart rate was from his strenuous training bout. “You caught me off guard.”

“Ah well it’s my fault. I should’ve known I couldn’t spy on a jonin—Hatake Kakashi, nonetheless—successfully,” the chunin laughed, pocketing his kunai as he walked closer to Kakashi. The silver-haired nin’s breath caught in his throat at Iruka’s confession. _Iruka had been watching him?_

Kakashi felt his face heat up from embarrassment. Iruka watched in amusement as Kakashi shifted in place, obviously uncomfortable with the sudden attention. “You were watching me? Why?” Kakashi wanted to disappear when he heard how high his voice came out. 

Iruka came to a stop a few feet in front of Kakashi, the lazy smile on his face growing into a lopsided grin. “I wanted to see if the rumors were true.” The jonin thanked the gods for allowing them to meet under the cover of darkness; his cheeks were warming rapidly the longer Iruka studied him curiously, that same crooked smile causing Kakashi’s heart to thump against his ribcage heavily. 

“And?” Kakashi hoped in vain that he sounded as bored as he was trying to look. 

Iruka hummed and looked at him thoroughly. Kakashi felt his entire body flush as he watched Iruka’s gaze slide over him slowly and deliberately before their eyes met. The jonin thought he would combust from the heated look Iruka gave him but quickly disregarded it and looked at the ground, becoming very interested in the grass below his sandals. His cheeks burned and he felt like he was suffocating beneath his mask. 

Iruka took a step closer and Kakashi forgot how to breathe. He looked up from the ground and tried to look bored while pocketing his kunai. His eye found Iruka and he forced himself to not take a step backward when he realized just how close he was standing. The chunin stood inches away from him now and Kakashi allowed himself to soak up every little detail. Iruka’s face reflected the pale light from the moon, his scar standing out harshly against the soft glow of his skin. His normally warm and inviting eyes were dark with an emotion Kakashi couldn’t decipher; the jonin’s stomach fluttered and he tried to fight the darkening blush he was sure glowed brightly like a _katon_ on his exposed cheek.

“I think,” Iruka started, his voice as low and dangerous as when Kakashi saw him the other night, “that you, Kakashi-san, are-”

Kakashi’s already fuzzy brain became more muddled as it tried to focus on Iruka’s words while ignoring the sudden intense burning sensation from his tattoo. He didn’t catch the end of Iruka’s thought and his vision blurred slightly, causing him to stumble backward before righting himself and slapping a hand to his shoulder. 

“Damn it,” he hissed vehemently. He tried to avoid looking at Iruka as he quickly gathered his kunai and shuriken from the wooden posts before shucking on his flak vest. He turned and tried not to yelp at Iruka’s proximity. The chunin stood with a ghost of a smile on his face as Kakashi tried to get a coherent apology out, his face consumed by internal flames once again. “I’m really sorry, but I have to go. It’s- I’m- I have to go.” He sighed and stepped back, raising his arms to form hand signs for the Body Flicker Technique. 

Just as he weaved the last sign, he felt Iruka’s hand on his arm and froze when he heard the chunin breathe out, “ _Incredible_.”

Kakashi materialized in front of the Sandaime once again, his head bowed with one knee to the ground. He passively listened to what the Hokage said but was too distracted by the deafening sound of his pounding heart in his ears and the lingering burn of Iruka’s touch on his arm.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ps i changed the tags a bit because i changed the direction i wanna go with this but it shouldn't affect the story too much :))


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